Lincoln's real assassin finally identified

For years the world has been fooled into thinking that John Wilkes Booth was the person who killed Abraham Lincoln, but I have the evidence and witnesses to prove otherwise. It all happened during an ordinary presidency meeting at my house one quiet afternoon in late August. We were discussing the usual agenda items when there was a loud crash and then a scream. The crash was my family heirloom Lincoln head mug (that used to be in the kitchen of Grandma Hansen) hitting my tile floor and shattering into a thousand pieces. The scream was my own when I realized what had happened. It wasn't until after the whole thing was cleaned up and I had calmed Naomi down that I realized why I screamed. Sure I was going to miss the Lincoln head mug that I called my "kitchen god" (Grandma was the best cook in the world and the mug had been in her kitchen for so long that I sort of used it as my cooking good luck charm!) The bigger issue was that Naomi was carrying the mug (full of pens and pencils) in one hand and a pair of scissors in the other hand. Thank goodness she let go of the scissors when she tripped and fell otherwise this story would most likely have a completely different ending.

Lincoln head mug, you will be missed and fondly remembered.